Dassen Saseru (Derailed)

There are many times when circumstances prevent desired action. The world waits for no man, life goes on. Whether we participate in progress or we sit on the side of the street holding our heads in our hands, rocking as if to comfort ourselves, as the parade passes us by, it is the same. At least, time sees no reason to pause. When our emotions demand we take a break although the incessant pace of life prevents any such possibility, we continue going through the motions - doing only that which must be done but accomplishing very little else. The hope, at least, is that no one recognizes anything is different. The hope is we can carry on the charade skillful enough as to prevent betrayal of the truth. It is hopeless of course. Hiding the struggle is certainly no more possible than convincing all who see a freight train in the number 2 lane of the Golden State Freeway that nothing is out of place. The proverbial thousand pound gorilla is only invisible to the one struggling to keep anchored to a reality that hardly exists.

Each morning is met as the previous thirty. Climbing out of bed to realize the reality is not the dream and the dream is not the reality. Waking to a reality that could only be accepted as the nightmare you wish would end but is only beginning anew – the new day embraces yesterday, seizing the old burdens.

Cracks form beneath the steel wheels, concrete and asphalt rend under undue pressures. The freight train continues forward as if it belongs except for the ruinous slipstream. A wake of destruction rather than a celebration of triumph, the freight train can do nothing but go forward, neither turning left nor right without the solid, stout rails to guide the way. Working, struggling to find the rails again before too much is lost.