Go, Ponder On These Things

“Therefore, go ye unto your homes, and ponder upon the things which I have said, and ask of the Father, in my name, that ye may understand, and prepare your minds for the morrow, and I come unto you again.” (3 Nephi 17:3)

The things we read or study in the scriptures aren’t going to just sink into our souls by accident. We must ponder on these treasures and pray about them, seeking for the blessing of personal revelation to teach us that we will fully understand what it is that our Heavenly Father wants for us.

Years ago, I knew a man who had given up every comfort in his life so he could devote his time to reading the bible. He sold his house and left his family and friends. He packed everything he felt he needed to survive his chosen lifestyle into a van and moved into a campground by a river. He spent every spare moment of his life reading the bible. He, however, never uttered a single word in prayer. He knew the bible both the old and new testament like no one else I have ever met. However, it was a knowledge devoid of spirituality or even understanding. I often asked him if he had found what he was looking for. Invariably, his answer would be, “not yet”.

I have wondered about him from time to time since then. I have also considered how much more there is to the words found in holy scripture or those delivered to us by modern servants of God than what we may gain through our own efforts and power. Even in a classroom setting, we will never find such great promise if we but rely only on the power and knowledge of man. The fullness of the gospel can only be obtained through the power of God. Only by seeking after it will we “be visited with fire and with the Holy Ghost, and shall receive a remission of [our] sins.” (3 Nephi 12:2)

I do not want to be like this man who lived in a van down by the river.

Humility - the foundation of spiritual strength

“And now, as I said unto you, that because ye were compelled to be humble ye were blessed, do ye not suppose that they are more blessed who truly humble themselves because of the word?” (Alma 32:14)

Since humility is the only foundation of spiritual strength, we are blessed when we successfully humble ourselves and prepare to receive the blessings of faith from our Heavenly Father.

I have lived through times when my pride or fear have interfered with my ability to embrace some aspects of the gospel. Conversely, I have experienced significant growth when I have been able to humble myself and submit to the will of our Heavenly Father. Although I have struggled too often, I do recognize the Lord’s guidance and blessings in my life when I successfully bend my will to His.

This morning, we experienced a weather event that first gave us freezing rain. The rain was then followed by snow. The combination of which proved incredibly slippery both on sidewalks and roads. As I drove to my office, I found myself driving down a slight decline toward an intersection. The slick environment overwhelmed the skills of many who would drive through. I watched as many cars slid into each other, some were spinning on the ice. I worked as best I could to drive slowly around the situation. Each time I touched my brakes or downshifted my tires would lose traction. It was difficult to maintain control. Just as I thought I was sure to get through the mess without personal incident, a small car sped up behind me. I panicked a little and touched my brakes trying to maneuver out of the way. Sliding, I was certain I would drift into the path of the speeding car. I am certain I was blessed as he slid past me without making contact with me nor did he bounce off the curb back at me. It seemed he was a hair’s width from making contact.

As this played out before me, a thought impressed itself on my consciousness - I was being blessed for paying my tithes and other offerings. How often do we really know why or when our blessings are bestowed on us? If I had not humbled myself and submitted to the Lord’s will, I would have been involved in an accident that would have surely caused major financial hardship and possibly bodily injury.

Does your God love you more?

As the year winds down and we're looking up the barrel of a new one, perhaps we could consider a new effort, a different chain of thought, a change in perspective. We've become so polarized, judgemental, stupidly blind to how others might feel. Let us, instead, be slow to pass judgement. We should allow increased brotherhood to brighten our lives and those with whom we cross paths.

When we encounter someone whose circumstances have left them in an undesirable place, perhaps we need to extend the helping hand, leaving our judgement behind.  For how does a critical thought or word lift anyone out of despair? 

Does your God love you more than your downtrodden brother? 

Politics seem to blind us to anything on which we might see eye to eye. This new year, perhaps we could change our focus. Rather than working to change our brother's foundational beliefs, let us work together on those efforts on which we already agree. Rather than holding so strongly to the 2% separating us, we could embrace the other ninety-eight.

Does your God love you more than your brother standing on the other side of the isle?

What separates you from your neighbor? What biases prevent you from accepting another human as your equal? What do you suppose puts you on a pedestal? Perhaps this year we could put those things aside and accept that we are all made of the same dirt. Our molecules are exactly the same. 

Whether you embrace an ancient God or modern technology and science, perhaps you should realize more fully that your God doesn't respect you or hold you in higher esteem than he does your brother. Perhaps we should take greater care to do the same.

Because I have been given much,
I too must give;
Because of thy great bounty Lord,
Each day I live;
I shall divide my gifts from thee
With every brother that I see
Who has the need of help from me.

Because I have been sheltered, fed
By thy good care;
I cannot see another’s lack and I not share;
My glowing fire, my loaf of bread,
my roof's safe shelter overhead
That he too may be comforted.

Because I have been blessed by
thy great love dear Lord;
I’ll share thy love again
According to thy word;
I shall give love to those in need,
I’ll show that love by word and deed;
Thus shall my thanks be thanks in deed.

Lyrics by Grace Noll Crowell (1936)

Does your God love you more?

The Politics of Saturday Night

Do you live your life based on a weekend philosophy? You know what I mean, don't you? Every morning as you pull yourself out of bed the thought on your mind is "I wish it was Saturday". The struggle is real. Your focus is just to get through the week so you can enjoy the few precious hours the weekend promises. Weekends are great! Weekdays. Not so much. Weekends are PARTY! Weekdays are a grind, work, sludge. Of course, sometimes we can pull off a weeknight party here and there. Until you get old. Then, the pain is real and doing that hurts, making weekdays even more unbearable.

It's not a very good way to live, is it? I mean, if we focus our life's happiness on those two days a week we're missing out on over 70% of what is possible. It's no wonder every time a new year rolls around we're stuck wondering what happened to the time. Why did it go so fast!

In 1990, a movie called Air America was in the theaters. I enjoyed the movie. I've not seen it much since but a scene in the movie struck a cord with me.

Billy Covington: What the f*** are you doing here, man? Do you believe in this war?

Gene Ryack: I used to believe in all these wars.[laughs]

Gene Ryack: See, I had this theory once. I believed in the politics of Saturday night.

Billy Covington: And...?

Gene Ryack: I rated all governments and countries by how good or bad their Saturday nights were... and... I KNEW that Moscow and Peking had to be a stone DRAG at that time of the week. So I was flying for a cause. I was fighting to defend... chicken BBQs and weinee roasts, and Ray Charles songs and drinkin' Southern Comfort till you passed out behind the bar.

Billy Covington: Politics of Saturday Night. I can relate to that theory.

Gene Ryack: Yeah, it's not bad, is it? Just not particularly true, that's all. I hear they party pretty hard in Moscow.

Billy Covington: No need to give up a good theory just because it isn't true.

You know what. Perhaps, there's more to life than what happens between the time we get off work on Friday evening and have to get back to the grind on Monday morning. Perhaps, we could be more fulfilled and happier if our "happy time" isn't confined to 29% of our lives. Perhaps, the weekend should be just an extension of the time we spend pursuing our true ambitions and those things that really do make us happy. Just a thought.

A Train Ride to No Where

There was little about the day that was ordinary. Mom had spent the morning cleaning house. The kitchen floor stood empty, ready to be cleaned. The chairs, usually neatly placed around the kitchen table, were lined up in the hallway at the base of the stairs. The boy imagined them to be a long train traveling through the untamed west...

He didn't really know where he was going or why. Boarding the train was a distant memory obscured by the events since. It seemed as though he'd been traveling these tracks for a hundred years. Riding horses on the range and herding cattle to market had been traded for the steel tracks long ago. Still, he considered himself a cowboy – a gun-toting, boot-wearing, grit-encrusted cowboy. There were other terms to describe who he thought he was: brushpopper, buckaroo, and cowpunch just to name a few. Some even considered him something of a scoundrel at times.

The train was going through unfriendly territory. What had come to be known as The Nation was full of danger – unfamiliar animals, unshaven men who'd shoot you for noticing, and Indians. He was certain that if he encountered any Indians, he was in trouble. Indians were mortal enemies of cowboys and everyone knew that. Shoot first or be shot. That was the rule. The risk was doubled due to the poor quality of the rails along which the train slithered. If you find yourself in hell, you want to get out fast. To push the train faster, though, would ensure derailment. This was a dangerous ride through treacherous territory. 

The train had been moving at a turtle's pace for hours. He knew it was only a matter of time before they'd encounter a group of indians looking for trouble. It seemed the only upside was the terrain didn't provide much cover for ambush. Cactus and Joshua Trees as far as the eye could see, hidden by little else. He was getting jumpy and the Joshua Trees could look uncannily like a man who needed a shave. 

Just about the time his vigilance was to give in to the unnatural quiet, he heard the wisp of a speeding arrow fly past his head. He'd gotten lucky again. The whole reason he was here had just let loose with a war howl sending his heart into his throat beating like a drum. His job now was to keep the uninvited guests from boarding the train. Flanked on both sides, he had to keep his focus moving. The grip of his gun was worn to fit his hand. It was comfortable and felt at home there. After shooting a few shots, the numbers of men trying to get on the train had started to diminish.

He was focused primarily on keeping the rest from getting on the train when he was startled by a soft, "hey . . .

"... buddy, it's time for lunch. How about a cheese sandwich?"

Mom and the boy had similar tastes. Grandma called it a "dry old cheese sandwich" but they knew it was the best there was.

In memory of our God, our religion, our freedom, and our peace, our wives and our children

Following the attack on the World Trade Center in 2001, the country was in an uproar. It was an easy choice for many to send in the troops, invading Afghanistan. Here we are 11 years later. We’ve fought in Afghanistan. We’ve invaded another country, Iraq. We’re still fighting in Afghanistan. Of course, I say, ‘we’ like it means something more than those who are actually there. I do not believe WE are doing anything of the sort. In fact, when the United States military invaded Afghanistan, I was worried.

The Book of Mormon provides an account of a secret criminal organization and the toll their secret plans had on society. This group called themselves the Gadianton Robbers. Although they were a terrible group with designs that were contrary to the good of the civilization, efforts to eradicate them were nearly impossible. I considered al Qaeda and their friends in the Talaban to be something more akin to the Gadianton Robbers than an organized country we could bring into submission through military force.

Again, here we are 11 years later. The Talaban hasn’t been stomped out and al Qaeda isn’t gone either. We’ve wasted so much blood and money in pursuit of these and others. Now, I fear another problem - the status quo.

We, the American people, have turned our backs on our military. We placate ourselves with yellow ribbons and hallow words of support. Little comfort does this provide the families who’ve lost their sons and daughters, fathers and mothers, sisters and brothers. We have become so used to these great and selfless people fighting in a far away place, against and for a people with whom we haven’t any connection that we’ll hardly give it a second thought. Two months ago, the United States military casualties in the Afghanistan fight exceeded a milestone. More than 2000 soldiers have lost their lives. It was a footnote to an otherwise normal day for those of us living in the United States.

I am reminded again of another account from the Book of Mormon: “But behold, great has been the slaughter among our people; yea, thousands have fallen by the sword, while it might have otherwise been if ye had rendered unto our armies sufficient strength and succor for them. Yea, great has been your neglect towards us.” (Alma 60:3)

Are we not too complacent in the status quo? What have we gained from their sacrifice? How many friends and family have gone into the battle only to give up the most precious possession of all?

I am going to have a hard time sitting in relative comfort Thursday afternoon without remembering all we’ve lost in our pursuit of revenge for the most atrocious foreign attack on United States soil. I worry we’ve grown far too complacent in our lives and we do little more than lip service to support the military. I am grateful for our military, our soldiers and their families. I am grateful for the sacrifices they’ve made for my family, my friends, my country and me. We need to do something more than just talk about how great these young people are. I worry that my gratitude is far too little, it's not enough.

Caring Glances

Sometimes words do not carry as much meaning as we would like them to. We want to convey our feelings, our desires, and maybe a little wisdom. However, the tools we are left to use – words – just cannot seem to fill that gap between what we want to share and what we can impart. It is interesting that sometimes a few moments of silent interaction between two humans can convey more than a thousand words and leave a deeper, longer lasting impression.

When a toddler is learning to take those first steps, seldom is eye contact with the parent lost. During these moments of excitement, a great boost is offered in the confident smiles of a loving mom or dad. Still, it is more than a mere smile; surely, the whole countenance is one of caring concern mixed parental pride. This is just one of many occasions when a child will look to the parent for an approving look.

A few years ago, the greatest man I ever knew looked at me with an approving smile and love in his eyes. I will never forget that day for as long as I live. Although it was one instant of many, it is most important because it was the last.

I am grateful for the loving care with which my parents raised me and for the moments like this one that helped me to know they did have pride in the person I had become.

Let There Be No "Could've-Beens"!

“I could have.” That is an incredibly sad statement. Its entirety is regret. You can’t say sorry and have it erased from existence. No number of words can outdo the inaction of yesterday. Our very personal haunting ghosts are conjured out of yesterday’s could’ve-beens.

It is for this reason, I seek to take hold of every opportunity presented me at the moment. Do what I can now for those around me so I do not remember what I should have done or could have done when it is too late.

I am grateful for the opportunities life presents, that we all have the time and energy to do and be.

“It is required of every man that the spirit within him should walk abroad among his fellow men! If it goes not forth in life, it is condemned to do so after death! It is doomed to wander through the world! Oh, woe is me! And witness what it cannot share but MIGHT HAVE SHARED on Earth and turned to happiness!” – Jacob Marley, A Christmas Carol

The Benefits of Gratitude

During the month of November there seems to be a lot of focus on gratitude. We’re taught as children how important it is to express our appreciation when others give us something or do something for us. Although we learn to say thank you, I don’t think we fully understand why it is important to be a grateful person. These lessons seem to focus on the one-way street of being considerate of others feelings. Although important, consideration of others doesn’t fully hit the mark because an ‘attitude of gratitude’ has significant, lasting benefit for the grateful person while only leaving a temporary impression on the receiver of that gratitude.

The real benefits of gratitude include the following:

Mental

·      Increased positive emotions

·      Being more alert, awake, and feeling alive

·      Experiencing more pleasure or joy

·      Being more optimistic, happier

Social

·      Being more forgiving

·      Increased generosity, compassion, and helpfulness

·      Feeling more connected, less lonely or alone

·      Being more outgoing, demonstrative, or animated

Physical

·      Lower blood pressure

·      Healthier immune system

·      Fewer aches and pains

·      Better sleep or sleeping longer, feelings refreshed in the a.m.

·      Tendency to eat healthier and exercise more

  

Because there are so many personal benefits that go with being grateful, would it not be wise to try focusing on being more appreciative all year long rather than just this one month? We should embrace a Lifestyle of Gratitude. Let’s be grateful people all year long. When we are grateful, we see the world in a different light, we’ll realize how wonderful life really is and we will find true joy.

Here are 10 things to do and remember that can help us be more grateful people:

Recognize the blessing of living in peace

Streets of Sarajevo, circa 1993

Do you realize the peace we are actually enjoying right now? We do not experience anything that would compare with living in a city being bombarded with air attacks. We do not have to worry about a sniper when we try to cross the street to get a cup of coffee or a gallon of milk. We are not faced with an Rwandan-like holocaust. We do not have to fear that our neighbors might try to kill us because our family has a different lineage or religion. Living in peace is a great blessing. This alone is reason for the sincerest gratitude.

You are actually rich

In our society, there is a real focus on obtaining more and more money. In fact, this may be the chief reason that makes it hard to be grateful. How rich are you really? Check out the Global Rich List. There you can enter your annual income to see how you compare to the world. Chances are, you enjoy an income that is greater than 95% of the rest of the world. Did you realize you are in the top tier of the world’s richness ranking?

Health and prosperity, you have it.

Life expectancy through most of history has been only 20-35 years. In fact, most of that time was spent dealing with diseases, poverty, and general misery. It has only been in the last century that human life expectancy has increased significantly at all. The current average of 67 years is far greater than any time in the history of man. In fact, the standard of living we have probably come to take for granted is far greater than almost all people in the history of the world. Even kings as recent as the 18^th century could not expect to live like we do today. If we consider the wealth we have combined with the health we enjoy, we are probably healthier and more prosperous than 99% of all the other people in human history.

Appreciate the good things in life

We have a tendency to see the bad things that happen in our life without recognizing the good things. This is actually pretty sad. Of course, when we watch or read the news, most of what we find is the bad, the denigrated, and the worst of what the world has to offer. We should take the time and make the effort to recognize the things that are good, even the little things matter. A couple weeks ago as I was walking through the isles of the grocery store, a stranger smiled at me. That act of kindness is a sure sign that hope is still a part of this world. When just one person can call you a friend, that’s an important reason to be grateful. Just a few “little things” can add up to great things.

A Journal

Many of us keep a record of our thoughts and experiences. The focus of our records can be directed more toward the good things that have happened and a little less on the bad. Writing about the things that impress you and recording the things that are good helps us remember them more clearly. When life takes a turn toward the dark and dreary and it becomes more difficult to be grateful, take a moment to read past entries in the journal. The journal then becomes a source of strength that can help overcome the hard times.

A sliver of good

Sometimes life’s events seem to pummel us with bad after bad. A few years ago, our family seemed to be beset with problems, loss and turmoil. I even had a couple friends comment on how difficult it must be, that they could not imagine being able to deal with the challenges we faced. Although there was a lot of difficulty, there were little things behind the bad that were positive. Those little positive aspects of the trials were huge blessings in my life. I would not even consider trading away those good things to make the bad disappear. It is a difficult thing but we need to understand there are always positive things behind all the bad things that happen. At the very least, bad things provide valuable lessons for which we should be grateful.

Gratitude Sessions

Theory without practice means very little in our lives. Knowing we should be grateful won’t help much if we do not practice being grateful. Arrange a time to specifically focus on recognizing those things for which you are grateful. A “session of gratitude” doesn’t have to be more than five to 10 minutes of thinking about the good things that happen and expressing gratitude for them. It would do well to have daily recognition of the good.

Positive Begets Positive

Two negatives don’t always make a positive. It does in math but it doesn’t when were talking about people. You will be like the people with whom you surround yourself. If you spend time with people who are always complaining, it will be most difficult to be grateful. Have you ever rubbed a nail or paperclip against a magnet? The nail or paperclip becomes magnetized. That is what happens when we rub elbows with people, we tend to take on the same characteristics as the people with whom we associate.

Giving makes us happy

When we focus on those things we have rather than the things we lack, we tend to be more grateful. Giving to others fosters a mindset of gratitude because we tend to focus on what we have instead of what we don’t have. You really have a hard time giving something to someone when you don’t have it to give. The tendency to focus on receiving is human and very common. It is also a trap of the mind that makes us unhappy and difficult to be grateful.

Resolution of Gratitude

We can practice and recognize everything in the previous nine points but the ultimate decision whether to be grateful comes down to a personal choice. Make a promise to yourself to focus on being grateful, to be a grateful person. You control who you are and how you feel unless you relinquish that control to someone or something else. So, make the decision, make it happen.

I am grateful for the added benefits of being grateful – the happiness that comes from a thankful heart.

“A man is not rightly conditioned until he is a happy, healthy, and prosperous being;

and happiness, health, and prosperity are the result of a harmonious adjustment

of the inner with the outer of the man with his surroundings.”   - James Allen